You Don't Have To Dig Yourself Out Of A Hole

Why you should always look for help closer to home first.

The cold air from the London morning acts like an alarm clock, waking me up to a new day and a new year back at home.

Over the past 4 weeks, my life has been turned upside down. Issues that I thought I had gotten over and long past made a sudden and swift reentrance whilst on the other side of the globe.

Having thought my anxiety had mainly subsided with years of research and introspection, I was not prepared for the barrage of negative thoughts and feelings that derailed my trip back in my mother's native South Africa.

Everything I had thought I had dealt with was brought to the surface, around familiar faces and new. There was nowhere to hide and it had to be dealt with there and then.

Deep paranoia and fears of the future lead me in a state of paralysis and isolation, not wanting to go out or be with anyone or anything I felt was threatening. I was not in my right mind and I was ashamed of who I was, especially around family and friends who I believed would reject me for being in the state I was in at that age.

But it was through this inner and outer crisis that something miraculous happened.

Who I thought I was had died, and the new me that was born was caretaken by those who I felt would reject it - my family and friends.

We who have suffered with anxiety and depression feel as if we have to deal with it by ourselves, because we feel we are innately unloveable as we are for having these "unacceptable" and "negative" emotions.

Yes, people can tell you how good you are or that you are loved, it doesn't have to be overtly abusive, but we can still not feel it.

We tend to blame those who were closest to us because they hurt us in the past. But sometimes it was not intentional, and we push away opportunities for connection, nurturing and healing as a result.

Our family and friends we may still have issues with, but when you are broken and on the brink, you begin to see those people from your family and friends who step up and pick you up.

When you fallen down a pit of despair, they come down and pull you back up out of it. If you would just let them.

My wish for you all this new year is to see who in your life that is still there can be there for you, even if you fear their judgment. Test the waters of the support network you may potentially have. They have wisdom and knowledge from lifetimes worth of heartache joys and pain. And through this process, you will sort the wheat from the chaff.

Yes, you must take personal responsibility for how you feel and your own healing still. But do not deny yourself of resources that will lead to a life of abundance and joy and make the road a quicker and easier.

So my advice for you this New Year is this: reach out for help from friends and family and see who is there for you. You may be surprised what you find.

If you enjoyed this post and want a personal guide to support you on your healing journey, comment below or message me and let's liberate you from the stress and anxiety and live a life of thriving and abundance.

Thank you

J x